Having a “talk” about where a relationship is headed can be awkward and uncomfortable, but it is a necessary conversation to have if it’s important to both people. If you are having feelings of uncertainty, it’s best to communicate these feelings with your partner. Questions to ask your boyfriend can help you decide if he’s truly ready to take your relationship to the next level.
Why Is This Conversation Necessary?
Asking the tough questions and having honest, open conversations about commitment can get uncomfortable, but it’s necessary. This talk provides an opportunity for both of you to establish what each of you wants from the relationship and check if you are both on the same page. Moreover, it gives you clarity on where the relationship is headed, which can prevent issues down the line.
Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend
An important conversation about the dedication you are both willing to give the relationship should be followed by the right set of questions. Here are some questions to ask your boyfriend if you’re thinking of getting serious:
- What Do You Think About Commitment?
This is the foundation question that should spark the conversation and provide an understanding of his opinion of commitment.
- What Are Your Expectations?
Where does he expect the relationship to be a month, a few months, or even a few years down the line?
- How Do You Feel About Transparency?
It’s vital to be open and honest with each other in your relationship. Ask him how he feels about having open communication.
- What Are Your Relationship Goals?
Does he want to be married within a specified time frame? Does he want children? Do you both want to further your careers? Finding out your long-term goals for the relationship is important to decide if you’re compatible.
- How Do You Feel About Our Differences?
This question can help you both identify whether your differences can benefit each other and make the relationship stronger or if these union could inhibit you from becoming a better couple.
- What Are Your Thoughts About Finances?
Finances play a large role in a healthy relationship, so make sure to ask this important question to ensure both people are on the same page.
- How Do You Feel About Family?
Families come in all shapes and sizes; it’s important to determine how your partner feels about his own family, as well as yours. Doing this will help you understand what values he may bring to the relationship.
- What Are Your Priorities?
It’s important to identify what’s at the top of your partner’s list of priorities, as his answer may provide insight into his character and values.
- What Defines Your Relationship?
In a committed relationship, it’s essential to establish what both partners believe defines their relationship. This can help ensure that you’re both on the same page.
- What Is Your Idea of a Healthy Relationship?
Discovering your partner’s ideas of what a healthy relationship looks like may provide information on how he may act in a committed relationship.
Points to Consider Before You Get Serious
It’s essential to go into this conversation with realistic expectations. There is no guarantee that both people will want the same thing from the relationship, so prepare yourself mentally for the possibility that the outcome could be different from what you’ve expected. Moreover, before you get serious with someone, it’s imperative for both partners to have self-awareness and inner peace. Make sure that you have truly allowed yourself to heal from past hurts, and that you can offer your new relationship and your partner your best self.
Benefits of Becoming a Serious Couple
When you are both ready to become a serious couple, the real joy begins. Here are some benefits of a committed relationship:
• Establishing a secure foundation in your relationship and having trust in each other
• Knowing you are both devoted to one another
• Spending quality time together and building special memories
• Developing a greater understanding of what makes the other person happy
• Setting shared goals and having a sense of belonging in common
• Supporting each other through the hard times and celebrating together
• Being seen and accepted for who you truly are
Hopefully, this conversation and subsequent questions to ask your boyfriend allows you to make a clear decision on whether to continue as a casual couple or move forward as a serious one. Regardless of the outcome, it is important to create an environment of understanding so that both parties are respected and can trust one another. Having open communication is the key not just to a successful relationship, but to a happy one, as well.
Good luck and happy dating!