Halloween is the perfect time to be spooked by things that go bump in the night, but there’s an extra special treat to enjoy, too – hilarious Halloween jokes! Whether you want to share some laughs with kids or adults alike, it’s always a good time for some Halloween humor. Have some cheap thrills and laugh it up with these Halloween jokes, complete with their punchlines for maximum hilarity.
Halloween Jokes for Kids
Getting the kids into the spirit of Halloween can be part of the fun – start things off with some of these kiddie-friendly Halloween jokes.
Q:What did the vampire say to the pumpkin?
A: “You look a-maze-ing!”
Q:What do you call two witches who share an apartment?
A: Broom-mates!
Q: What type of shoes do monsters wear?
A: High Screams!
Q: How do monsters like their eggs?
A: “Terri-fried!”
Q: What did the ghost say to his friend?
A: “Long time no sea!”
Q: What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton when they met?
A: “Flesh to meet you!”
Q:Why was the monster standing on the edge of the lake looking down?
A: He was afraid of the deep b-ghoul!
Q:What did the monster call his daughter?
A: “Frankenstein!”
Q:Why did the ghost go to the bar?
A: To get a “boo-zzle!”
Q:Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
A: He had no body to go with!
Halloween Jokes for Adults
Just because you’re no longer a kid doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy some of the sillier parts of Halloween – so have a chuckle with some of these funny yet grown-up Halloween jokes.
Q:Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind!
Q: What happened to the witch who ran out of perfume?
A: She had to get some spelltaneous!
Q: What did the vampire say when he purchased the necklaces?
A: “That’s fangtastic!”
Q: What did the witch say when she was offered candy?
A: “No Thank You! I’m trying to witch my weight!”
Q: What did the witch say when one of her spells went wrong?
A: “Oh crumbs!”
Q: Where do ghosts go when they want to chill out?
A: The spooky-tar!
Q: What do vampires say when they meet?
A: “It’s nice to meet you. Fangs for coming.”
Q: How do zombies start a race?
A: “3…2…1…Brains go!”
Q: What did the zombie do when he lost his arm?
A: He looked for it…but in the end, he had to give up.
Q: What did the vampire say when he saw a girl with garlic?
A: “That’s just a clove of my affection!”
Funny Ghost Jokes
Who said ghosts don’t have a sense of humor? Here’s a collection of funny ghost jokes to keep things light – read on to join in the spooky fun.
Q: Why didn’t the ghost go to the party?
A: He had no body to go with!
Q: What did the ghost order at the restaurant?
A: A “Boo-dae-sige”!
Q: What did the ghost do in the shower?
A: He fogged it up!
Q: Why did the ghost cross the road?
A: To get to the scary-or!
Q: How does a ghost laugh?
A: “Boo-haha!”
Q: What did the ghost chef serve?
A: “Spookie noodles!”
Q: What did the ghost say to the other ghost?
A: “Do you boo-lieve in life after death?”
Q: What did the ghost get for his birthday?
A: A “Boo-quet” of flowers!
Q: How do ghosts talk to each other?
A: Through “Ecto-phones!”
Q: Why are ghosts such good storytellers?
A: Because they have a lot of “experience-ment!”
Scary Halloween Jokes
Some jokes that don’t have to be too silly to have an element of spookiness. Here’s a few jokes that’ll promise to make you jump at the end of the punchline.
Q: How does a witch keep her hair in place while flying?
A: With “scare-spray!”
Q: What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A: A “Sand-witch!”
Q: What did the vampire say when he ate garlic toast?
A: “That was a littles-clove-y!”
Q: What did the scared ghost say?
A: “Ahhh boo!”
Q: What did the skeleton say when he saw a ghost?
A: “Don’t scare me like that!”
Q: What did the three skeleton’s order at the restaurant?
A: “Run bones!”
Q: What did the monster do when he lost his watch?
A: He had to go time-treating!
Q: Why don’t vampires have birthday parties?
A: Too afraid someone might “stake” the surprise!
Q: Why was the mummy so depressed?
A: He was in a “wrap-er!”
Sure to be an absolute scream, Halloween is a time for laughter and good cheer, and having a few Halloween jokes to hand is an essential part of the festivities. Whether you prefer the super-scary jokes, the gentler ones for the kids, or a mix of both, these Halloween jokes should be enough to fill your spooky night with plenty of giggles.
So don’t be shy – get joking around with some of these Halloween jokes and ensure your wit-sit-satisfaction. Enjoy!